theme

katbot:

Professor: Your essay must be 3,000 - 6,000 words

Me: image


3 hours ago  -  via - source  

oeste:

do you ever cook something in the microwave but it’s still really cold in the middle and you just keep eating it instead of heating it longer because life is pointless and entropy is unavoidable and the universe is filled with callous and casual destruction


3 hours ago  -  via - source  

3 hours ago  -  via - source  
engineeringofjose:

chevy-raised-jack-daniels-fed:

merrymaudlin:

mercurykiss:

thugburrito:

My faith in pizza guys has gone up 123%

NO LET ME TELL YOU A STORYSo a few weeks ago I was in a hotel in Savannah with my grampa in the hospital next door, Mom was over staying with him, and the battery in the smoke detector went out so every 5 minutes it would let off this loud, high pitched ‘CHIRP’.It was annoying as fuck, so I called the front desk to see if they had a battery for it, and they said the only thing they could do was change rooms. We’d already settled in for the night, and needed the next door rooms for my uncles the next day, so I said I’d deal. My uncles had my car in the next town over, so I couldn’t drive and get one myself.An hour later, I’m ordering pizza and have gone insane because the damn thing CHIRPS. SO. MUCH.So I begged the pizza guy on the phone to stop and get me a battery, told him I’d pay for the battery, and give him an extra tip for it, and he was chill with it. This adorable fucker gets to my room with the battery, opens it, asks to see the smoke detector, CLIMBS ON THE BED, CHANGES THE BATTERY FOR ME, and tests it.My pizza was only 20 dollars, but I gave him 40 and told him to keep the change.

I am clearly not fully utilizing my pizza delivery person…..

What’s next pizza delivery hitmen

hitmen

engineeringofjose:

chevy-raised-jack-daniels-fed:

merrymaudlin:

mercurykiss:

thugburrito:

My faith in pizza guys has gone up 123%

NO LET ME TELL YOU A STORY
So a few weeks ago I was in a hotel in Savannah with my grampa in the hospital next door, Mom was over staying with him, and the battery in the smoke detector went out so every 5 minutes it would let off this loud, high pitched ‘CHIRP’.

It was annoying as fuck, so I called the front desk to see if they had a battery for it, and they said the only thing they could do was change rooms. We’d already settled in for the night, and needed the next door rooms for my uncles the next day, so I said I’d deal. My uncles had my car in the next town over, so I couldn’t drive and get one myself.

An hour later, I’m ordering pizza and have gone insane because the damn thing CHIRPS. SO. MUCH.

So I begged the pizza guy on the phone to stop and get me a battery, told him I’d pay for the battery, and give him an extra tip for it, and he was chill with it. This adorable fucker gets to my room with the battery, opens it, asks to see the smoke detector, CLIMBS ON THE BED, CHANGES THE BATTERY FOR ME, and tests it.

My pizza was only 20 dollars, but I gave him 40 and told him to keep the change.

I am clearly not fully utilizing my pizza delivery person…..

What’s next pizza delivery hitmen

hitmen


3 hours ago  -  via 
theillumanti:

50 shades of grey trailer

theillumanti:

50 shades of grey trailer


3 hours ago  -  via - source  
zaynsfuck:

sweet-bitsy:

hiccupartist:

who is she

Miss America

She’s beauty and she’s grace
She’s Miss United States

zaynsfuck:

sweet-bitsy:

hiccupartist:

who is she

Miss America

She’s beauty and she’s grace

She’s Miss United States


3 hours ago  -  via - source  
" Cunt again? It was odd how men … used that word to demean women when it was the only part of a woman they valued."

 sheriff-swan:

— Asha Greyjoy, A Dance With Dragons   (via scrlett)

WHERE’S THAT GIF OF THE JUDGE BANGING THE GAVEL AND GOING OOOOOOOOOOH

image

(via aryousavvy)


realitytvgifs:

I love this new update

realitytvgifs:

I love this new update


notbolin:

if october to january isn’t your favorite time of the year you’re wrong



3749 
 reblog
ladylike-maniac:

fit-fierce-fab4ever:

60ibs-to-go:

My kind of marathon 

there’s another kind?

This is our life.

ladylike-maniac:

fit-fierce-fab4ever:

60ibs-to-go:

My kind of marathon 

there’s another kind?

This is our life.


hopelessly-cliche:

the entire ballad of andrew giggles


6316 
 reblog

huffy-lemon:

Favorite text posts part 6


657 
 reblog
heidiiibx:

Quote. | via Facebook on @weheartit.com - http://whrt.it/10Snr1f

heidiiibx:

Quote. | via Facebook on @weheartit.com - http://whrt.it/10Snr1f


120 
 reblog